Dear Diary,
Spira’s upset. There, I said it!
The good kids Rehana and Dan are moving to Seattle to find a Gino’s replacement with Alissa. Do they even make pizza in Seattle? I think they owe me an apology.
Young Alex and Crystal are going to Phoenix for the winter – they’re not better than me! Spira could see himself in Phoenix, many babes and much sun. It could be Spira Time all the time in a place like that!
Where has Busse been? He owes me money and a new picture for the website. Ryan Taylor is a punk, as usual. Spira wants to go to Miami, but he’s all, “There’s a pandemic, Tom. I don’t want to get on a plane!” What is he afraid of, anyway? I’m not saying it’s anti-Semitism, but what else could it be, Diary? He’s not better than me.
Are you aware that today is Friday? Bang Zoom! Spira’s headed to Gino’s and you know what that means. I’ll save you a seat at my booth, but you’d better hurry!
Cordially,
Tom
Editor’s Note: This post was co-authored by the aforementioned Alex Mollón